Declaration of Independence for the Eldest (Olivia)

I just thought I would post an essay Olivia turned in & I stumbled across last week. At first when I read it I couldn't stop laughing. Then I thought to myself (for a second) " Are we that bad?" Nahh! I asked Olivia if that's how she really felt and if so she needed to print a retraction or an amendment or something. But she reassured me that it was an exaggeration. Well it better be! Got to love teenagers!

Olivia Mora
AA-sophomore
26 Aug. 2008

Declaration of Independence for the Eldest

When in the course of family events it becomes necessary for us to become one and resolve the conflict between certain members of the family. We should work to have an environment which involves creativity. When things get so bad at home a declaration of freedom becomes necessary and an explanation of the reasons.
I hold these truths to be self evident: that all siblings are loved equally; that there is equal allowance; that there is a fair share of leftovers; that I am responsible for my own intake of sugar; and most importantly, that the oldest does not get blamed for mostly everything.
The history of the present parents of the Mora family is a history of unnecessary arguments and quarrels having absolute tyranny over the family.
They have refused to allow time with friends on weekends. This requires at least a week of heads up and close examination to test endurance to be perfect. If I do one thing that is not permitted the thought of social time is rejected.
They have distributed Christmas presents unfairly. The youngest gets the largest of the gifts while I get the smallest ones.
They have discriminated due to age and punish for saying so. If any of my siblings are caught doing something wrong in my presence the fault falls on me for not preventing the situation.
They have taken away the right to watch television, especially during the good shows. The shows are mostly always my favorites and ones showed for one hour only on Saturday nights.
They have forced the practice of sports and extra-curricular activities at all times, which leaves hardly any time of the day, and when there is there is no energy to do much of anything due to exhaustion.
In every state of these oppressions I have raised objection to what I believe to be wrong and punished for doing so. I have tried to see reason in the laws and restrictions by questioning the meaning but getting the useless answer of “because I said so”. I have pointed out that I, being the oldest, gets in far more trouble than the three others have. I have also reminded them that although I may be the first born my brothers and sister of lesser age should be accountable and responsible for their own actions. I have said that times of today regarding teenage practices are far more developed and complex than those back in their day.
I therefore, the eldest, solemnly publish and declare freedom in the home and to be equally part of the family. I should be tried for reasons other than line of birth and to have a say in what I practice. I should be a free teenager and have full power to do all other things other teenagers have the right to do.